


Faded like the Chilliest Summer Day

by VenusUnchained



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga), Code Name: Sailor V
Genre: Angst, Day 5, Spooky, VKWeek2018, Venus/Kunzite Week, ghost - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2018-10-12
Packaged: 2019-07-29 19:34:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16270901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VenusUnchained/pseuds/VenusUnchained
Summary: Haunted by the past in ways Mina never knew were possible.





	Faded like the Chilliest Summer Day

**Author's Note:**

> Venus/Kunzite Week Day 5! Ghost! I wanted this to be a little spooky...I actually really like this piece a lot for what it is. I hope you enjoy it! I could definitely expand on this one if you do! :D

She's not sure when or where it comes from. It creeps in like a fog on the chilliest Autumn morning and she wonders if the chaos her life has been lately simply masked it. Maybe it's been there all along, this heavy oppressing feeling, lurking and waiting in the darkest corners of her days and nights. She finds her skin creeping with goosebumps in the middle of the day when she's sitting and chatting casually with her friends. It hits her out of nowhere because it's warm out, there's no reason for her to shiver the way she does. The sun beams over their heads and the happy laughter of Usagi, who warms everything, rings out over the kids yelling on the playground because of some hilarious trope she's read in the latest manga.

Mina finds herself looking over her shoulder a lot as though she can feel icy fingers run down her arms in a way that shouldn't feel familiar. She's on her way to work the first time she feels this, that overwhelming urge to run sending nervous signals up her spine. She makes eye contact with the business man behind her on the crowded sidewalk who glares daggers at her because she's apparently walking too slow and he's late for a meeting. Mina simply shrugs it off because it's not an enemy, and she begins to think that maybe all the hardships her life has dealt her is finally catching up. She wants it so badly for it to just be some symptom of trauma, but the cold pit in her stomach tells her it isn't so.

Mamoru is acting strange too. He leaves for Harvard soon and they're pretty close friends so she begs him not to go. It will be too hard on Usagi who is far too sweet to tell him how much she'll hurt, how hard that long distance will be for her. Mamoru acts strange anyway, a kindred spirit of sorts in the mental trauma department but it's different this time and he leaves anyway. He doesn't call or write and Mina's infuriated because it's her that has to pick up the pieces for Usagi who is inconsolable as she knew she would be. She know that something is horribly wrong.

Usagi confesses later that Mamoru hid things, even from her. It only serve to infuriate Mina further though it temporarily distracts her from that chill crawling up her spine and making her every hair stand on end. Mamoru has always been a private person, uncomfortable and a bit stand off-ish but when Usagi admits she found a box with four stones in it, she feels like she might throw up.

That night is the first she feels afraid. The apartment is dark, door locked and Artemis has become more absent these days to stay with Usagi and Luna. Mina knows she's alone but can feel someone standing just in the threshold of her bedroom and living room. Her apartment is small so it's easy really to know when you're not alone and the feeling she's being watched becomes overwhelming. She finds herself holding her breath, not realizing she's hiding beneath the thick duvet since she's been so cold lately. Finally she gets brave, she's Sailor Venus after all, and she throws back the covers ready to blast someone into the next life because she's no coward. The room is empty, she's greeted by darkness and the faint light of her clock radio. She almost laughs hysterically, feeling ridiculous and flops back against the pillows. Her laughter is cut short, because the feeling doesn't go away.

She's not a superstitious person, even if she still has a small box in her closet containing a gold ring of the planetary symbol for Venus, an ace of hearts card that could slice through steel and a dirty white glove with a heart cut out of it. It's a box she doesn't dare open because it reminds her of curses and death. She doesn't know why she keeps these things but it makes her understand a little why Mamoru would keep the box of stones and hide them away. It doesn't make her less angry at him and Usagi confirms that he's taken them with him to America because the box in his drawer is gone. Mina's certain Usagi stays at the apartment more than she should because she has a key and misses him.

Their enemy is strong. The strongest they've ever had to face and she finds herself too tired to think most nights but can't sleep because she feels eyes on her even when all the curtains of her apartment are tightly drawn. She doesn't know how she knows these eyes are pale but only one set of pale eyes ever held this much weight and it terrifies her. She can almost feel him, looming over her bed as she tries to sleep though when she goes to confront the intruder she's greeted with nothing. The enemy doesn't care how tired she is, perhaps they prefer the leader of the Senshi to be exhausted. Mina's afraid she'll be so tired that she fails Usagi again. The enemy certainly doesn't sleep either.

She encourages Usagi to date again. It's been a couple months with no word from Mamoru and one of their newest allies is interested. Seiya looks a lot like Mamoru, maybe more fun so it doesn't take much convincing. She finds herself drawn to Yaten who isn't particularly interested in any of them, only the mission which draws her in even more. It thrills her that the three men can shift into women because she's had it with men mostly. Mina's thrilled by the challenge and effort it take to finally get Yaten to agree to a date, he seems interested maybe in her body alone but barely even that. The girls all walk along their path at the park and she's chattering happily about her new potential lover when like a punch to the gut the fear hits her cold in the stomach and she feels the urge to run.

Mina grows quiet, her eyes darting along the wooded path for any reason for it. He knee begin to shake and give because she thinks perhaps she sees a sliver of silver drift through the trees. She feels terror despite the sunny afternoon and even Rei comments on her pallor with concern. She's barely able to spit out an excuse to leave because her teeth chatter now and tell them she's not feeling well before walking briskly in the other direction. They all know that Mina is strange, different, but Usagi looks sad because she knows it might have something to do with a pale pink stone. She can almost smell something spicy on the light breeze as she exits the wooded portion of the park's path, and runs the rest of the way home.

Her dreams are vivid tonight. She can almost feel his warm hands roam over her body and taste the heat of his kiss on her lips. They taste like blood suddenly and when she shoots up in bed she can almost see his pale outline in the door frame of her bedroom. Mina shakes and doesn't want to see so she hides beneath her covers the rest of the night cowering like a child. It only begins to get worse.

She's with at least one of her friends and soldiers nearly at all times and she knows they all worry, even when they whisper to each other that she's finally cracked beneath the pressure. She works, takes a few hours to get dinner with Yaten and insists they go to her place to make love instead of her apartment. Last time she swore she felt him watching. There's a battle later and between the sex and fighting it's the only time of the day she feels normal.

Mina starts to blame the enemy for messing with her head though they spit acid at her and tell her that she haunts herself, they send no ghosts. It doesn't stop her from thinking she sees him, walking ahead of her on the crowded sidewalk, or drifting through the trees at the park, or even standing the silent sentinel over her bed while she tries to sleep. All she can ask herself is why? Why does he haunt her now more than he did the days after she killed him? Why is it HIM and not Ace since she still has personal belongings of his carefully tucked away and hidden? The girls think she's starting to lose her mind, and Mina begins to think she'd prefer that explanation.

She feels like she's drowning tonight. The dark pressure of the ocean is smothering her and she can't break free because the skirt of a dress she hasn't worn in centuries are too heavy. There's no air, no light around her except maybe a faint light that she seems to be giving off herself. She's deep, far below the foaming surface of the sea and yet the Elysian castle is huge and looming like a ghost ship in the forgotten depths of the ocean. She's stuck, anchored down by her dress in the remnants of an old garden that she knows in gross detail from memory.

What terrifies her most is the grinning skull she stares at, desperately seeking the grey eyes that should have been in the empty sockets. His hair still floats around him, wispy and too stark white against the darkness where it should have been a vibrant shade of silver. The familiar cape clasps are still shining faintly in the dim light she's radiating, still attached to a rotted uniform with the first three buttons undone at the chest revealing the top of an empty rib cage. He's held beneath the waves by rusted chains, what's left of him more empty and desolate than the ruins around her. She coughs up water when she wakes up screaming, and notices it's salty.

Usagi's in love again, it's been months since anyone has heard from Mamoru and she's mostly proud that her Princess has branched out to someone as magical as Seiya who is more sexually ambiguous than Haruka mostly because he can be a she anytime they want. He can be an ass, as all three of the Lights tend to be but mostly she likes him because Usagi seems happy. No one is shocked that Mina has been seeing Yaten. It's really not much more than sex, shopping, or the occasional dinner. There's a talent show coming up, a good chance for her to become an idol again and Mina has been considering it. The rest of the girls were seeking their dreams but she's the leader of the Senshi and Yaten makes her feel worse for it.

No one want to point out the obvious to her. Mina's watching the Lights perform and she's been in denial until now and nearly split her lip open from biting it too hard. She's preferred Yaten as a female and as the boy band performs it all comes together. He looks like Ace mostly, young with vibrant pale green eyes that are only just slightly darker than her old love. Her first kill. Yaten's hair is long though, and silver. The way he commands the stage, how his sense of duty nearly rivals her own makes the cold stab to the gut so much more potent. He's the perfect mix of the two only real loves she's ever had, ironically with pale hair and eyes. Yaten barely tolerates her though, more or less because the sex is better than good and they are forced to work together. Mina swallows a lump in her throat and cheers with the crowd, pretending she doesn't feel a chill in the humid little venue where everyone else is sweating.

She thinks trying to move on would make the eerie feelings go away and she is wrong. It's made worse tonight because she's curled up against Yaten's chest in her place with her brothers, inhaling the light fresh scent of her perfume and enjoying the feminine curves that make her think she's not trying to substitute another silver haired man. She feels his eyes peering at her from some dark corner of the room and clenches her eyes shut, trying to bury between Yaten's breasts. She's pushed away with an annoyed groan and can feel the weight of his stare and feels terrified. She begins to shake her lover who growls and opens her eyes just long enough to glare at her before she turns to her side, turning her back on her. She silently wishes Yaten was a man currently so she could hit him where it counts.

She feels alone and not alone at the same time. It sets her teeth on edge because she's faced monsters before, worse evils than most people can imagine but never ghosts. Mina's more afraid than she's ever been in her life and wants to cry but that's just not her style. She gets up and quickly begins to dress, not payin attention to whos clothes she's grabbing or if they're inside out or backwards. She probably woke Yaten, if not the whole house, when she flew out the door unapologetically making a ton of noise because she just needs to get away at this point. Her feet thud against the pavement as she runs, the streets empty in the dark hours of morning, heading home because there's nowhere else for her to go.

Mina rips open the door, calling out to Artemis who doesn't respond because he wouldn't be there. Her hair like sunshine in the dark is messy and her clothes are only half thrown on and inside out but she's frantic and tired. She feels his eyes again.

She swallows hard, inching her way further into the apartment without bothering to turn on lights. It never helps anyway. Her blue eyes dart back and forth, like there's much space to begin with, but it's then that she hears a whisper.  
  
"I am fading." She hasn't heard his voice in thousands of years. Not his true voice, only an arrogant and poor excuse for his puppet that sounded like him, and didn't at the sa me time. His true voice, on that used to whisper such pretty and loving words as he made love to her, and spoke of duties and foreign lands that he was never able to show her, this is the voice that she hears now and her fear begins to fade.

She hears him, genuine and tired. She can now see him flickering, standing by her windows in the moonlight like a faded motion picture, his features barely discernible as the faint glow of his ghost.

Mina pads slowly over to him, carefully as though his specter might bolt out the window but he stands firm as he always has. She sees there is no definition to his eyes, they glow faintly but are only white. Her heart leaps into her throat, the familiarity now of her hair standing on edge and the cold chill that overtakes her small living room. She's not scared anymore, not really now that she has an answer and the air around them holds a spicy smell that she didn't know she craved. She feels like weeping, it's been her own secret to keep but she's missed him.

"Where will you go?" She hears her voice, it's as old as the way she bites her lip now. His head shifts slightly as though he looked at her, his features seeming to sharpen at the sound of her.

"I don't know where I am now." His voice is but a whisper on the gentle hum of her air conditioner but she wants to keep hearing it. It's been distorted in even her dreams she realizes, it's much smoother than rough as she seems to recall.   
"Why are you haunting me?" She feels her bottom lip quiver and she's unable to stop it. She wonders how much longer she can keep the tears that prick her eyes at bay before she weeps for him.

"I think that would be obvious." He states cryptically and Mina can almost see him frown. She wants to pull him to bed with her and envelop herself in a warmth he hasn't possessed in thousands of years.

"I wish I could touch you." She whispers, hanging her head just slightly and it becomes harder to contain her emotions. There's no harm in confessing to a ghost. Dead men tell no tales. "I miss you." Her voice cracks and a tear does fall now as his specter seems to gain more strength at her words. She can better see his face and wishes her feelings could bring him home to her.

"Mina..." Is all he can say. She can now see the scar in his brow, the light downturn of his lips and the silver shade of his hair but his eyes are still plainly white. She wants them to be grey.

"Dammit why did you do this? Why did you leave me the way you did?" She wipes the first tear away, another is quick to replace it. She wants to beat on his chest and demand answers. "Please say something..."

"I need to see you smile." Her eyes widen and she realizes the ghost is smiling now, he's beautiful but it's an impossible feat for her to smile right now. "Please Mina."

She wants to break and yet she smiles. It's practiced by now and he knows it. His hand tries to touch her and it's nothing but a cool breeze that floats through her arm. His specter flickers and she knows there isn't much time.

"You promised me... you promised me this life." She sobs now, her practiced smile crumbling under the weight of her sorrow, she can't help it. She never mourned for him when she killed him in this life. He was nothing more than catatonic dreams created by trauma. She screamed, she hated, she didn't sleep or eat but she never shed a tear until now.

"I have had this life." He answers and she wants to scream at him. She wants to throw things at him and cry because it's not fair. It was supposed to be HIM in this life. It was supposed to be their chance. HE was supposed to save her from the curse Ace lay over her heart because only HE could do it. "I'm so sorry..."

"Fuck you." She bites, glaring up at him. He frowns but nods. She doesn't want him to be understanding. She wants him to be real, and angry with her for sharing someone else's bed with someone that looks something like himself and Adonis. It was only ever supposed to be him.

"I'm fading Mina." He says softly again. She sobs again, wanting to kiss him, smell him, feel warmth instead of the chilled air that raises every hair on her body.

"I need you Kunzite." Her voice is desperate, pleading and she hates herself, but who would he tell? She'd never seen him cry before and yet his face looked like he wanted to if he could. "I want you with me." Her voice is broken between sobs, still pleading as though is hope where there isn't.

"I need you to be the strong one again. I need you to say goodbye." He's doing it again, forcing her hand and she hates him. But she doesn't.

"I'll never say goodbye." She's determined like that even when it's for the best. Closure that she needs and refuses to accept because she's stubborn. She's frantically wiping tears away, smiling through them because she thinks that's what he needs to see.

"I don't know what will become of me now. But I needed to see you one last time." He flickers and she's afraid he's gone. She doesn't see him anymore. "Goodbye... my Goddess. My Mina..."

She crumbles when she feels him go. The air no longer smells like a cool desert night and the cold spot has passed. She falls to her knees, her hand grasping the window ledge because the room begins to spin. All she knows is she is crying, sobbing, and mourning a love she'd never have. Perhaps they would always be forbidden to each other.

Yaten is there, she didn't hear him come in but he finds her curled on the floor barely breathing through the tears. She thinks he understands her a little better now, noting that only Artemis has ever seen her this broken but she can't pull the pieces together enough to care. He's not heartless so he allows her to cling to the t-shirt he managed to pull on in his rush to follow her out the door, saturating the shoulder with tears. He holds her, green eyes lifted to the darkness. He doesn't say so but she thinks he saw it too. She's glad he's shifted into a man now, she needs stronger arms to hold her even if she finds it harder to look at him this way. He stays, they say nothing but she makes him stay this way when he strips her down and brings her to bed. It's simply an action at this point when he takes her, and wrong as it is she needs this. It's the first time in a very long time she pretends its someone else. She pretends it's a ghost. 


End file.
